Meet fifty ....
Chapter 13
Driving
back to the hotel from Anastasia’s apartment, I keep thinking about all the
things Flynn said earlier. I really have to make up my mind about what I am going
to do if she tells me that she wants to have a regular relationship with me.
I
am absolutely certain that I am not capable of doing that, but on the other
hand I really do not want to lose Anastasia. I am not really sure how she has
become so important to me, but she has.
Earlier
I stormed out of my meeting with Flynn, I think I will have to meet with him
again tomorrow just to get some more things straight in my head.
I
am still not buying his bullshit about me being in love, I know that, that is just
not possible. This is just an infatuation that I will need to control like I
control everything else. But I still need to make some adjustments, because
Anastasia is still completely new to this, so I will have to be even more aware
of how she reacts than I would normally be with an experienced sub. But I do
not understand women at all, I can read them in bed and I am good at reading
people in general, but when all that feelings crap comes out, I do not know
what to do. I may need to ask Flynn for advice on that matter. Just to make
sure that I do not fuck her up by being with me.
I
have a lot of things to do tomorrow which is probably a good thing since I will
not see Anastasia tomorrow. But then again I was not supposed to see her today,
but that ended differently anyway. But I really should give her some time to go
over the contract so we can discuss it over dinner on Wednesday. I am actually
really worried about this dinner, it could be make or break time.
When
I get back to the hotel I decide to email Anastasia before I go to bed, just to
let her know that I am thinking about her and wish her a good nights sleep.
What
I receive in return is somewhat surprising, she has gone over the contract in
detail and is writing all the things that she is having doubts about.
I
tell her to go to bed and then I go about reading her email in more detail in
order to try to understand what her issues are about this.
2: Not sure why
this is solely for MY benefit – ie to explore MY sensuality and limits. I’m
sure I wouldn’t need a ten-page contract to do that! Surely this is for YOUR
benefit.
I guess that she does have a point there, this
is for the benefit of both of us. I can agree to that.
4: As you are aware
you are my only sexual partner. I don’t take drugs, and I’ve not had any blood
transfusions. I’m probably safe. What about you?
What the fuck does she think, of course I am
safe. I get checked every six months.
8: I can terminate
at any time if I don’t think you’re sticking to the agreed limits. Okay – I
like this.
Finally something she is not objecting to.
9: Obey you in all
things? Accept without hesitation your discipline? We need to talk about this.
That’s the fucking point of being a sub, you
have to obey me. I am seriously beginning to wonder whether she even has a
submissive bone in her delectable body. She keeps resisting me on all this.
11: One month trial
period. Not three.
That’s no time at all. That I will definitely
not agree to.
12: I cannot commit
every weekend. I do have a life, or will have. Perhaps three out of four?
That is what I was worried she was going to say.
That will not do, I have to have her every weekend or this is not going to be
what I wanted it to be.
15.2: Using my body
as you see fit sexually or otherwise – please define “or otherwise.”
She really is going all nitty gritty on me.
Despite my extreme irritation at the moment I have to say that I am also
smiling. This is so typical Anastasia, to pick everything out and not just give
in to my demands. She really is not as submissive as I thought at first.
15.5: This whole
discipline clause. I’m not sure I want to be whipped, flogged, or corporally
punished. I am sure this would be in breach of clauses 2-5. And also “for any
other reason”. That’s just mean – and you told me you weren’t a sadist.
That is just the point of being in a contract
like this and it is starting to irritate me that she cannot see this. If I
cannot punish her, then I will not get satisfied. It is when I punish a sub
that I really let go of all my frustration and anger. I get to whip the shit
out of a little brown-haired woman.
15.10: Like loaning
me out to someone else would ever be an option. But I’m glad it’s here in black
and white.
Typical of Anastasia to just point it out to
show her defiance.
15.14: The Rules.
More on those later.
Uh oh. She is not happy. I am wondering whether
she is just picking this apart for the sake of it and then saying goodbye
tomorrow, I really hope that she is not.
15.19: Touching
myself without your permission. What’s the problem with this? You know I don’t
do it anyway.
But I sure wish you would do it in front of me.
15.21: Discipline –
Please see clause 15.5 above.
She is not giving in that easily.
15.22: I can’t look
into your eyes? Why?
Stubborn beautiful woman.
15.24: Why can’t I
touch you?
I am not getting in to that with her, she will
just have to accept this one, with no questions.
Rules:
Sleep – I’ll agree
to 6 hours.
She is so stubborn, can she not just accept that
I want her to sleep 8 hours a night so she is well rested.
Food – I am not
eating food from a prescribed list. The food list goes or I do – Deal breaker.
Fuck, this is not good. Food is a big issue for
me and I need to ensure that she is eating properly. If she does not want to
agree to this rule I will have no possibility to hold her to it.
Clothes – as long
as I only have to wear your clothes when I’m with you... okay.
Why can she not agree to accept gifts? Any other
woman would love to receive gifts.
Exercise – We agreed
3 hours, this still says 4.
That will need to be changed. I did agree to
only 3 hours.
Soft Limits -
Can
we go through all of these? No Fisting of any kind. What is suspension? Genital
Clamps – you have got to be kidding me.
I will have to explain in detail what all this
is, I am guessing that with no sex experience at all she is at a loss for what
all this is even though she has researched online.
I am seriously annoyed after reading her email. At
this point I really do not think that she has a submissive bone in her body,
but I am willing to ease up on some of the points in order to try and see if
she does have a submissive side to her.
But I will just remind her what the definition of
submissive is. It will not do for her to forget that.
I type out an email reminding her what the definition
of submissive is and then I just hope that she will remember that when we meet
on Wednesday. Even though I just left her a few hours ago I feel like Wednesday
is a million miles away and I miss her. I can smell her on me, which is an
extremely sexy smell. Her scent mixed with the smell of sex. But it would be
even better if I were in her bed holding her.
After a few restless hours of reading and answering
emails I finally go to bed to get a few hours of sleep before another day
begins.
When I wake up early in the morning as usual I am not
at all surprised to find that I am in a horrible mood and not at all in the
state to participate in several dull meetings while my thoughts are straying to
Anastasia.
Control freak that I am, I check the update from the
covert security I have for Anastasia. I reminded Taylor last night that
Anastasia is going to work today, so I expect to be informed if she goes out to
lunch with anyone or anything else happens.
After the mornings first meeting I decide to call
Flynn and arrange to see him in the afternoon, for just a short session to wrap
up the one I stormed out of yesterday.
After a
few more meetings and lunch it is time for my appointment with Flynn.
“Hello,
Christian”
“Hello,
John”
“I take it
you were not satisfied with yesterdays results since you decided to come back?”
“I know I
overreacted by storming out of here, but I was aggravated that you kept telling
me that I am in love.”
“I will
not talk about that today, you seem to be of the very firm belief that, that is
not possible. What I would like to talk to you about today is how you will
handle if Anastasia tells you that she wants a regular relationship and not
sign your contract.”
“That is
quite simple, John. That will not happen.” I am lacking the conviction of my
words though.
“You seem
very sure of that?”
“She has
gone through my contract and is willing to negotiate.”
“So you are willing to concede some of your rules in order to accommodate Anastasia?”
“So you are willing to concede some of your rules in order to accommodate Anastasia?”
“Yes of
course. I can’t expect her to want to do all the things I normally do when she
is inexperienced.”
“But you
do expect her to engage in a full on BDSM relationship?”
“Yes, that
is what I do. I have told her that I am not interested in anything more than
that and she has accepted that.”
“Has she?”
“Yes, as I
said she has gone through the contract.”
“Has she
signed it yet?”
“No, she
hasn’t. We are going out to dinner tomorrow to discuss it.”
“You are
taking her on a regular date, to discuss your BDSM contract? Interesting.”
“Why is
that, doctor?”
“You are engaging in something that is very normal for young couples, but the topic of this date is very abnormal to a young couple such as you are.”
“You are engaging in something that is very normal for young couples, but the topic of this date is very abnormal to a young couple such as you are.”
“Let me
ask you, Christian, how much are you willing to concede for Anastasia before
you tell her that she is asking for too much and let her go?”
“I haven’t
thought about it like that, John. We will discuss it tomorrow and come up with
a solution that is acceptable for both of us.”
“Okay, I
accept that, Christian. But how will you ensure that you are not pressuring her
into this with you?”
“John, you
know I would never do that and frankly it pisses me off that you would think I
would do that.”
“That is
not what I mean, Christian. What I mean is that Anastasia is aware of your
attitude towards having a regular relationship, correct?”
“Yes.”
“Maybe she
will want to be with you, but from fear of you rejecting her if she asks for
something other than what the contract includes, she might sign it just to be
with you.” Fuck, I have not thought about
it like that.
“She’s a
grown woman and she knows what she is saying yes to.”
“Are you
sure she does that? As you have mentioned yourself she has never been part of
the scene.”
“I will go
easy on her and show her how to be a good sub and train her. I will not take
her too far.”
“You are
so stubborn! I know you are very experienced in reading body language and will
accommodate her inexperience. I am talking about her feelings. She is new to
this and might be insecure, especially if she is falling in love with you as I
suspect that she is.”
“Here we
go again. I fucking don’t do feelings, you know this.”
“Yes, you
keep repeating that. All I am asking is for you to pay extra attention to how
she reacts after you’ve done your thing to her in your playroom. She may find
it overwhelming and need a comforting shoulder from you.”
This is
ridiculous, he cannot expect me to nurse her through this, she is a grown woman
who going in to this of her own free will. Earlier I did think about this whole
feelings crap, but now I am just angry about talking about this.
‘Okay, I
will look after her.”
“Good,
Christian. Now before you leave, I will ask one thing of you. I do not need you
to answer this for me right now, just consider it.”
“What is
that?”
“If
Anastasia tells you that she wants to have a regular relationship, please
consider that you are willing to concede and compromise on some of your rules
in the contract. Maybe you should be willing to concede some of the barriers
and rules you’ve put up around your personal life as well. Since you already
seem to be enjoying such regular things as sleeping and eating dinner with her,
I think you should consider that it might not be a bad idea to do this with her
if she wishes to. I’m not saying you should decide on this matter right away,
just consider it, Christian.”
Oh, this
is stupid. I am not going to agree to anything, but just to keep him quiet I
agree with his point.
“Okay,
John, I’ll consider it.”
As I leave
John’s suite I consider what he has said. I have already conceded too many of
my rules, it is not going to happen again.
When I have
had a shower I go to the computer to catch up on some emails, a little pissed
that I have heard nothing from Anastasia all day.
When I sit
down my phone rings, yet again. As the CEO I’m used to my phone ringing more or
less all the time, but I’m not used to hearing my sisters screeching voice on
the other end.
“Christian,
you have to tell me about your girlfriend. What is she like? How does she look?
I bet she beautiful, at least that’s what Elliot says.”
“Well,
hello, Mia. Nice to hear from you. How are you doing?”
“Orh cut
the crap big brother. Spill the beans, I want to know everything about her.”
“Look, Mia
… this is still pretty new, so I’d like to just see where it goes.”
“Okay,
sooo? You can still tell me about her. You’ve never had a girlfriend before, so
you can’t exactly blame me for being interested.”
“I guess.”
“Christian!
Just tell me something.”
“She’s a
student at WSU and working part-time in a hardware store.”
“Jeez,
Christian. You’d think you’re trying to give me her resume. Something about her
… as a person.”
“Hmmm.”
“Christian,
I am not letting you go until you say something. Is she sweet, pretty, ugly –
something, Christian.”
“She is
really smart and sweet.”
“Is she
pretty?”
“God,
you’re annoying, you know that.”
“Christian…..”
“Yes, she
is very beautiful.”
“HA! I
knew it. Do you love her?”
“Enough!
This conversation is over. Shall I pick you up at the airport on Saturday
morning?”
“Fine. But
I will drag it from you one way or another. But I guess you must love her since
she’s already met Elliot and mom.” I figure silence is the best strategy at
this point so I ignore her comment about love.
“Fine,
Christian. Yes I would like you to pick me up Saturday morning. I can’t wait to
see you, I’ve missed you so much while I’ve been away.”
“Okay, see
you on Saturday then. Email me your itinerary and I’ll be there. I’ve missed
you too, Mia.”
“Bye big
brother.”
Mia was as
ever extremely annoying, but I do understand her interest seeing as I have
never brought a woman home.
I have to
figure this shit our before I meet up with Anastasia tomorrow, I need to be
prepared if she ends up saying no.
I am going
for a run.
I don't own any of the fifty shades or the characters therein. They belong to EL James. I'm just borrowing them for fun and not for profit. Please refer to the Legals page for further details of the intellectual property rights for this work.
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I love hearing what he is thinking. Great job. I love it.
ReplyDeleteThank you Denise :)
DeleteNext please!!... Lol ya can't just leave me hangin
ReplyDeleteHaha, you're going to think that every time a chapter is finished ;)
DeleteLove it! You are doing a great job on C POV! Keep it coming! Can't wait for next Friday for Ch14. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you so much :)
DeleteGreat chapter, looking forward to the next one and the meal ;) x
ReplyDeleteThank you Davina :)
Delete